Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
wow bdsm is so cute
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
