M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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