If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize