she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize
