My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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