So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
