I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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