Moan for me like Helen Keller
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
