Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
