....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
