SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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