i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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