Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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