Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Randomize
