why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
