Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
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