mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize