a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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