Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
it glows. i had to have it.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
