fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
