I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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