They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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