don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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