I hate your face
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
40s are totally the cure
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
