Fuck appropriateness.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
