My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Randomize
