I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
