it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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