its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
