it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
