some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
