It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
