My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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