Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Randomize
