Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
