so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I am full of burrito and curiosity
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
