He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
