I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
