How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
me + whiskey = a bad person
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
