were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Randomize
