One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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