Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
no, he came in my armpit
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
