grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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