We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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