spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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