Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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