During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
