did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Randomize
