ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Randomize
