Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize
